I believe...from myspace

I believe...

Finding my way in an institution where so many ways are already set up. Sometimes when I feel that there is an expectation - it makes me squirm. Saying no makes me squirm. But I can't live to others expectations. I know that. I don't often have trouble with it but every once in awhile I do. It's funny that I have tried to work with what has been done at my church for so long. But yesterday I finally gave myself permission to admit that what was being done doesn't work for me. And now I can find my way! How flippin cool is that. I went into a meeting yesterday ready to run the meeting the way it has been done at least for 5 years - and I started it and just felt AWKWARD. Adults and youth are looking at me - waiting for whatever words that I was going to pass on to make it worth their time to even come to the meeting...and I started by thanking some of the parents that have served the youth group for about 7 years and then I paused and said "I don't know what we are going to do next with this committee but it's not working as it stands now". And most of them nodded in agreement! Whew. So what are we going to do next? I don't know. But I am excited. Have I mentioned before that I love my job? It is crazy at times - especially this time of year...where I could be at a dance recital, graduation, awards ceremony almost every night - but I love that I get to walk with students. So this leadership committee...I am praying that we figure out how to best use all the adults and youth that want to lead - and get them leading! Also, I am ready for a discernment council or a sounding board- which is a fancy way of asking a group of people to sit with me periodically and pray...bounce ideas around and make decisions about the direction of the youth group. So I have asked different adults to think/pray about that. Yes! The thing that I am owning more and more is that I serve a God that is in love with me and with every one of you. And I crave that more and more people know that...own that...