I am in Nashville for the National Youth Workers Conference. This is possibly my 8th or 9th year to attend and every year I come into it not really sure what to expect. When I worked for interlinc and I attended all three conferences in the fall - I started to feel superior. I mean, when you go as often as I have and have learned as much as I have...what else is there for you to learn???
This year, I am actually excited about being here. I am tired right now but I am excited to be here with 5 amazing adults from my church. I can't wait to hear about their experiences and what they start dreaming up for our youth ministry.
But right this minute...I am completely broken. I don't really even know what to write. I just listened to Francis Chan at the first general session.
He spoke so many things that I have struggled with at different times. Now don't get me wrong, I have been able to ignore those same things as well, but I have struggled at times and I really don't know what to do with what I feel. Don't know what to do with this struggle.
If I am called to be salty...then have I missed the point completely? Am I still salty at all?
Am I excited to be a disciple of Christ? I talk about the church in Acts 2 often and struggle with the fact that I don't feel like we living as they did then...They were unstoppable.
And now we leave church if the carpet color is wrong or if the music is the kind that we like. They sold everything and shared it together...we put a huge amount of money into a retirement fund while a HUGE amount of Christ followers are starving all over the world (including our back yard) and then we have the nerve to get worried if we have a financial crisis. What if we trusted God with our retirement and gave the money to people in need throughout our lives...
...to be continued...