Monday, September 24, 2007

Monday, Monday...

What a weekend.
I drove up to Nashville with Mary Ann to hang out with friends and just play - my favorite hour was under a tree in Centennial Park, near the replica of the Parthenon. We were lying on a picnic table just watching joggers work up a sweat and couples walk hand in hand to share lunch at a near by table. We must have taken a table that a squirrel normally lays claim to because he was bothered. He would run up and down the tree and head to the branches that hung directly over me...we started laughing about how he might throw things at us to discourage our lounging.

Mary Ann asked me a question. "How did you end up in youth ministry instead of worship leading or what Rick does." she asked. Rick's the choir director at my church. If you know me at all then you probably know that I love music, whether it's classical or worship or folk - there isn't much I don't enjoy or can't get into. Her question stirred up such a longing in me and I couldn't put my finger on it at the time. I slowly responded, while watching the leaves dangle and move over my head in the breeze, " know, I think it has to do with the fact that I long to be in relationship with people more than creating a place for them to be in worship through music."

I sat there in silence trying to place exactly the reason why I made this choice over another. How do we "end up" where we "end up"? I would love to be a worship leader. To sing and play guitar and stand in front of people as we sing songs about how God's love has changed and continues to change our lives...

"I think it's because, honestly, I have never been very good at learning to do something that I can't already do well."

I have students that are becoming worship leaders because they have a gift AND they practice the guitar or whatever instrument that they are playing every day. I don't even pick up my guitar except when I am helping the students lead worship for youth every Sunday night.

I am good at relationships. And I can sing. Already. I don't have to work to hard to do either - so did I "end up" as a youth director because I can build relationships with the students? Is it cause I am lazy? Singing doesn't have much to do with this thought process except it's one of the 2 things I do.

My youth ministry is based on relationship. Empowering my students and adults to build real relationships with God, with each other and with every person they come into contact with. Learning to recognize and honor the image of God in each other.

I wouldn't be a good worship leader - I can do it with my youth because they love God and through Him love Me enough to put up with the D Chord for all the chords I can't play and every time I sing the wrong words or start the song to slowly. Sometimes they don't even know it when I make mistakes...

I am not sure why I "ended up" as a youth minister. But it's a huge part of who I am.

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