Friday, February 05, 2010

Tension. Hope. Contradiction. Light. Shadow.

Whew.  I tell you what.  Life is sometimes more than I can handle. 

The ride I am on is definitely calling me to more.  More trust.  More hope.  More letting go. 
Allowing God's light into my shadow life.  

John 3:19-21 - The Message
"This is the crisis we're in: God-light streamed into the world, but men and women everywhere ran for the darkness. They went for the darkness because they were not really interested in pleasing God. Everyone who makes a practice of doing evil, addicted to denial and illusion, hates God-light and won't come near it, fearing a painful exposure. But anyone working and living in truth and reality welcomes God-light so the work can be seen for the God-work it is."

Parker Palmer talks about "living the contradictions"..."Here we refuse to flee from tension but allow that tension to occupy the center of our lives.  And why would anyone walk this difficult path?  Because by doing so we may receive one of the great gifts of the spiritual life---the transformation of contradiction into paradox...a larger truth than we had even dreamed." 

Where we live in the great dramas of life - the place where God and the world interact.  Living a life with God only points out the contradictions...the contrast of the truth of the spirit and the lies of our lives.  The Spirit wholeness and the brokenness of our lives. 

It seems to me that most people don't sit well living in the contradiction.  We either have such a HARD time with the contradiction that we walk away from God's love and light...or we try so hard to live as far away from the world and to stay "pure". 

So I am attempting to live in the contradiction.  The light and the darkness.  The risk and the hope.  There are many things in my life that I would have NEVER expected even 5 years ago.

I drove to Dairy Queen on Scenic Highway on Tuesday at 6:10 a.m. this past week.  The sky was changing and I had to see it over the water.  The contrast of the dark sky with the beauty of the coral/yellow light piercing through...  I am so thankful for that time that I had with God. 

Lamentations 3:22-23 - The Message
God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
   his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
   How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
   He's all I've got left.

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